The Gangs of San Miguel de Allende - Rumble in the Jardin

New Blog Site

2008-03-27T04:50:00.002-07:00

Word press has a much better site for a blog so the blog has migrated there

Go HERE for the new blog

Why Gangs Formed in San Miguel

2008-03-23T05:20:00.008-07:00

WHY GANGS HAPPENED

In his book Art and San Miguel Gang Psychology, Donald Watson says

“When women first pick up a paint brush, or silver wire or glass cutters, or a pen to write in San Miguel, an inner voice that has been stilled for so many years starts to speak. It tells them they are CREATIVE. They rush home and begin to see their home in a different way. They see it as a source for CREATIVITY and a source to help them EXPRESS themselves. So the rugs, drapes, table coverings, bedspreads, curtains, towels, dishrags, table runners around the house soon disappear from the house and appeared as CREATIVE clothing.”

When Donald looked around San Miguel he found that the Instituto Allende, the Bellas Artes and the Biblioteca were the three most important places for awakening that CREATIVE inner voice.

The first household item wearers in San Miguel were brave pioneers who suffered mightly from snickers in the Jardin. But as their numbers grew and the gangs formed the snickers turned to whispers. Now women can walk freely and proudly in the Jardin wearing whatever they found that morning on the floor or on the wall or in linen closet. They welcome your stares and pictures because they believe you are honoring their CREATIVITY.

But not all gangs sprang from unleashing the CREATIVE inner voice. The Classic Gang sprang from their husband, ex-husband or late husband's open wallet. ART to this group was not something you did but something your bought. They came to San Miguel to buy. They started with FABULOUS houses. Then one day in 1994 Missy Craigthorne noticed that some of the shabbily dressed people in San Miguel were carrying canvasses. She followed them to the Instituto Allende and had her mystical moment. They were ARTISTS. Out came her husband's wallet and she bought her first piece of ART. Word spread throughout town that the shabby people had nice stuff to sell. Within a week there was no art left in town.

But the Gamay family recognized an open wallet when they saw one and in 2001 opened

FABRICA AURORA

Finally women of substance had a place to go and spend their days and their money.

NOT GANGS

As you start to look for the Gangs of San Miguel your eye will go towards groups who are dressed alike. But be careful not all those who dress alike are in a gang. Here are two examples of people who dress a like but are not in gangs.

This is also not a gang

Love Slaves

2008-03-22T10:45:00.006-07:00

LOVE SLAVES

Gangs are not just about ART but also about LOVE. Women come to San Miguel to find LOVE. But there aren't enough men to go around to provide the LOVE. So some women fall in love with San Miguel

I just LOVE it here in San Miguel.
San Miguel is so special to me.
There is such magic here.

San Miguel becomes their LOVER and their Muse.

Here is a book with that title.

But gangs have given women a new purpose in San Miguel. They become Gang Mamas and capture love slaves. Love Slaves have so many purposes - asset holders, bridge partners, beasts of burden, bill payers, place holders, wallets, fetchers, drivers and so many more. Men who used to be someone in the U.S. are reduced to mere Love Slaves in San Miguel. They walk with their heads down following the MRS and waiting for instructions.

CAPTURING A LOVE SLAVE

Capturing love slaves is a major gang activity in San Miguel. Gang members work in pairs. Gangs are always on the look out for unattached males. Here two gang members search the Jardin for a love slave.

Once they spot an unsuspecting male they begin to follow him.

Soon one gang member moves ahead of the Potential Love Slave and the other walks behind him. Notice how members from two different gangs work together to share a Love Slave. Men are scarce so sharing is the only option.

Using their womanly ways they entice him to be their Love Slave with promises of cooking and clean underwear. For a minute the Love Slave may try to escape.

But the lure of cooked meals and clean underwear is too much and he falls into step behind his Gang Mamas.

As soon as they are captured they are put to working by the gangs. This man has been indentured as a bag boy.

This man simply holds a burro and a horse waiting for his Gang Mama to come back

That is why gay men are so popular in San Miguel. They can still think and talk for themselves.

Read about a Love Slave Rebellion

Read how one woman found a business opportunity to capture love slaves

Read how the Shaman Gang uses power animals to capture love slaves

Shaman Gang

2008-03-22T08:45:00.002-07:00

Shaman Gang

Some gangs have taken their colors and identity from the indigenous people of Mexico. The Shaman Gang uses power animals (dogs)to capture Love Slaves. Sparky is leading his Shaman to a potential Love Slave.

The Shaman uses her power animal (a dog) to hypnotize a single man into being her love slave

Mexican Reaction To Gangs

2008-03-22T08:25:00.003-07:00

GRINGO FREE ZONES

San Miguel has been changed over the years by the invasion of American Gangs. They have bought up almost all the houses in Centro and all the land with a view. This has pushed Mexicans further and further away from Centro and the Hills. Tourist know nothing of this and the creation by Mexicans of Gringo Free Zones. Signs warn you about Gringo Free Zones. If you are a tourist and see this sign on the outskirts, do not enter a Gringo Free Zone. Gringo Free Zones have are no lattes, no art, no wines, no maids, no dried flowers, no pretty painted houses, no one who speaks English and no cable TV. It is a scary part of Mexico and not like the United States at all. It is almost like a foreign country - so unSan Miguel. You will get no service there. So watch for the signs and KNOW.

MEXICANS FIND WAYS TO USE GRINGAS

Little is written or said about what Mexicans think of Gangs and Gringras. The closest analogy is the spread of milfoil or zebra mussels in North America. Once introduced they are difficult to eliminate. But the Tuesday Market has found a use for Gringas. They are a bit tough and utterly tasteless but with some salsa rojo o verde they aren't bad.

FROM ATENCION

Field of dreams: Soccer matches organized to deter gangs
By Jesús Ibarra

Gangs based in some neighborhoods within the city threaten public security and pose a challenge for local law enforcement.

Vandalism, street fights, throwing rocks at police cars, defacing property and consuming alcohol and drugs in the street are among the gang-related activities the local government hopes to curtail.

Gang Apparel

2008-03-22T07:59:00.003-07:00

CLOTHING AND GANGS

She stays in the doorway. Her friend is in the store buying her new gang clothes. Decisions, decisions, decisions. Should she join a gang or should she keep her old identity? She doesn't know who she is anymore. She was a small town accountant back in the States but who will she be here? Will she be an actress or a sculptress? Will she have been the mistress of a famous shoe maker or Don Knotts? Will she tell people she has to avoid Doc Severinsen in the Jardin? Oh which gang? Is she a rug girl, a false boy girl, a classic girl? Does she have the flair to wear a tablecloth? Can she get a love slave? Life is hard for the newly arrived.

WHERE TO BUY GANG CLOTHES

Several people have asked where do Gang members get their clothes. Often they are hanging just in front of you. This wall hanging was used very successfully by this gang member.

Other Gang members see something fetching hanging on a door or shop door and know it is for them

THE BAGS OF SAN MIGUEL

Everyone in San Miguel carries a bag – gang member and nogangos. Nogangos is the name gang members have given to anyone not in a gang. If you aren’t wearing a household item or aren’t in a male gang you are a nogangos. Bags are the one thing that bring people together in San Miguel. They are not signs of gangs but signs that we have lots of art and Mexican stuff to buy in San Miguel. If you are sitting in the Jardin ask people if you can look through their bag. In fact most people will let your rummage without even having to ask. When you find art or Mexican stuff, hold it up and say
”Tell me where you got this?” Everyone who has been in San Miguel for more than one day will have a recommendation of where to find something “Fabulous”. But when you hear people’s voices drop and say the words “Fabrica Aurora” then you have found someone who is a “True Patron of the Arts”. These are the holy people of San Miguel

DOWNSIDES TO WEARING HOUSEHOLD ITEMS

It is not always easy for Gang members. This poor gang member was wrapping herself in a chair throw when her love slave started to escape. As she ran to catch him the open weave of the chair throw got caught on a door knob and he got out the door. Since she can’t leave the house without wearing her gang outfit she tied it loosely around her hips and began to run after the escaping love slave. But he has a good head start. Again another gang member has experienced the downside of open weave.

HELP IDENTIFY THIS GANG

There is an interesting short film by Caren Cross called Lost and Found in San Miguel . I had a tough time figuring out in the film who was Lost and who was Found. I wasn't sure if the Lost part happened before they came or after them came to San Miguel and even more confused about what they had Found. As I looked around to find what they had found my blog was formed. The Found have found a sense of belonging that manifests itself in what I call joining a Gang - a gang you can't find at home. Each gang has its colors and dress code and unique behaviors.

Some gangs are easy to identify but this gang member has me puzzled. I see a bag (but everyone has a bag). I see a table cloth. I see a Mexican blusa. I see little dolls sewn on the blusa. But I don't see the theme. I don't get this gang. Maybe she is Mexican but that answer seems to obvious. HELP

Colors Gang

2008-03-21T09:00:00.004-07:00

Every member of his Gang chooses they own color. They dress from head to toe in that colour.

No-one is Alone in San Miguel

2008-03-21T06:02:00.007-07:00

No one wants to be alone in San Miguel.

Several sociological studies of expats and gangs in San Miguel have shown that being alone can be dangerous. Groups provide constant chatter to drown out individual thoughts. San Miguel organizes groups to do all sort of things - Photography tours, walking tours, art classes, language classes, excursions into people's homes, help the poor tours, help the poor tours even if they don't want it tours, butterfly tours, movies etc. etc. It is endless.

Lone Ranger Gang Part of the Comics Gang

2008-03-21T05:34:00.009-07:00

There is something about cowgirls and San Miguel.

This gang takes it inspiration from Comic Book Characters.

This man is part of the Back Lot Gang.

Love Slave Rebellion

2008-03-16T05:11:00.003-07:00

Clean underwear and cooked meals often don't compensate for having to listen to endless chatter. This man is begging a group of older Mexican women to look after him. If they take him it will be a win win for him. Clean underwear, cooked meals and not able to understand a word they say. The problem - they haven't a clue what he is saying.

Found in Parque Juarez

2008-03-11T07:08:00.004-07:00

New Strategy

Never let it be said that the Gangs of San Miguel are without ingenuity. Sandra Grove, while building her home on Recreo, stumbled upon an opportunity. Too many Love Slaves had slipped through her hands and when the contractor was installing palm trees in her yard she had her Eureka moment. Scoop up the Love Slave, hence the Sandra Grove Manlift business.

Grove Manlift
152 8992
Open 24 hours
Let us Scoop You a Man

Photography Gang

2008-03-11T06:10:00.005-07:00

This gang is all about the picture no matter how intrusive and invasive the taking of it is. These photographers are posed in front of the San Juan de Dios procession on March 9 oblivious to feelings of the people attending the event. This a picture Marjorie of Des Moines took.

They proceeded to photograph as the procession moved towards them, only moving at the last moment.

They then moved to the Jardin to further intrude into people's lives.

Finally they left the Jardin to find more "local" pictures to take.

Photographers lurk everywhere looking for that "Special Photo".

Diane Arbus.. despair.

These photographers seem unable to understand how the taking of their "interesting" little pictures shows a complete disregard for the feelings and integrity of the photographed.

Claus Gang

2008-03-02T16:54:00.006-07:00

Mr. and Mrs. Santa Claus winter in San Miguel.

Mrs. Claus pictured here likes to eat and take art classes.

Mr. Claus (Santa to the children, Gary to his friends) just likes to be in the Jardin and talk.

This gang is unlike other gangs because of all the good works they do. Santa is involved in almost all the charities in San Miguel and Mrs. Claus (Tiny to her friends) loves to paintings and give them to anyone who will take them. Here is her last and hopefully last painting.

Gang Dogs

2008-02-28T16:13:00.010-07:00

GANG DOGS

Dogs are power animals in San Miguel. They provide wisdom and power. The Shaman gang uses power animals to capture Love Slaves.

Others use dogs as jewelry and/or purses. These dogs are often called "My Best Friend" and may even be dressed like the owner. This is also known as a Canape Dog.

There appears to be an direct relationship between wisdom and the size of the dog.

Below is a chart showing some variations in the size of dogs.

Appetizer dogs are often eaten by larger dogs.

Canadian Gangs

2008-02-28T16:11:00.002-07:00

Canadian gangs don't like to be confused with Americans but they are ever so subtle. Can you spot what makes this man part of a Canadian Gang?

Gang Shopping

2008-02-28T16:07:00.002-07:00

Gangs tread a careful path between good works and bad works. Some gangs are philanthropic. Some are downright mean. It is often hard to tell the difference between shoplifting and shopping.

Joan Black Memorial Seat

2008-02-28T14:48:00.002-07:00

Contest of the Week - Where Would You Wear This

2008-02-27T11:01:00.001-07:00

Gangs of San Miguel de Allende are CREATIVE as they have taken art courses at Bellas Artes and the Instituto. Today's contest is called "Where would you wear this".

Sharon is holding something discovered in the Butterfly Sanctuary god knows where. No butterflies where killed in its production nor were they disturbed. So put on your beret and start to think where you would wear it. Is it a hat? Is it a necklace? Is it a belt buckle? Could it be a pair of shoes? The winner of this contests gets to have dinner with two live men. So put your comments below and your email address.

This contest is not open to tourists.

The Parasol Gang

2008-02-22T16:15:00.008-07:00

She is not alone in the Jardin. For months she was the only Parasol on the block but the Gang is growing. At least three other women have picked up the Parasol, blocked the sun and are hoping for rain. They will taunt by yelling "No UV for me" and have been known to use the parasol as a weapon.

A fifth member has appeared. This gang is growing far faster than people imagine. There was even a paper parasol in the Jardin last week.

This gang can only be identified from the Parasol. Remove the Parasol and confusion reigns. This woman has a Classic Gang hat but a Rug Gang covering.

ARCHEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY

The discovery of this parasol by a contributor has the Jardin in a buzz.

Gangs are competitive in San Miguel. Members of the Rug Gang are always trying to outcarpet each other. The various Hat Gangs are always swamming the hat vendors in the Jardin for something "new". Imagine the excitement of the Parasol Gang with this new Parasol. One member has even coined a new slogan "Here Comes the Shade". So be prepared to lose the sun.

Pseudo Female Gangs

2008-02-22T16:07:00.005-07:00

Things they are a changing in San Miguel.

I know in the US that the Lions have their Lionettes and the Kinsmen the Kinettes and the Rotarians the Rotary Anns but I never expected Gangs in San Miguel to create MMG's (mini gangs for males). Finally sensitive males in San Miguel can support their women in their careers as Gang members. Here we have a male who is in the MGM for the Classic Gang and a MGM for the Rug Gang. Today there are snickers in the Jardin but tomorrow there will be whispers.

Can You Fit Through Here?

2008-02-21T16:39:00.005-07:00

Every sidewalk in San Miguel has these "Eye of the Needle" initiation poles. Perhaps you have walked through one or looked at one and decided it might be too narrow so you stepped around it. But you were being watched and your decision recorded.

The Classic Gang will let no one join if they did not walk through the Eye of the Needle. Anyone who sidesteps the Eye of the Needle has made that split second decision that they are TOO BIG to pass through. No further discussion is needed about TOO BIG. You are relegated to the lower level rung rug and tablecloth gangs where you will be able to find something to fit.

Warren Hardy Gang

2008-02-19T07:15:00.004-07:00

This gang is identified by the yellow bag they carry announcing they are part of the Warren Hardy Gang. Warren is one of the few men to develop a large well organized Gang in San Miguel. He and his partner Tuli have been here since 1990 recruiting members. They have four levels of membership. Level 1's can be seen struggling with their power verbs in the Jardin. They are constantly telling Mexicans what they want, need, like, can, have to and where they are going. Sometimes it is a question and sometimes it is a statement. Level's 2's live in the past and tell Mexicans what they paid, saw, ate, cooked and where they went. Few Mexicans understand them but they smile nicely and say something they will never understand. Level 3's and 4's are all very tense and have seven levels of tension. They can be understood by Mexicans and are very dangerous as they can now buy real estate.

Cars and Gangs

2008-02-19T06:59:00.004-07:00

"What's with the colored Volkswagens"

Colors and Gangs are like Bread and Butter. CREATIVE women go beyond household items to coordinating their outfits to the car they drive. Here is the Pink Car Gang, the White Car Gang, the Red Car Gang and Mary Kay Car Gang and a member from each gang. The Mary Kay Car is missing a member. Well Mary Kay is missing more than a member.

Day of the Dead Gang (Facelift Gang)

2008-02-18T19:08:00.008-07:00

The origin of this Gang's colors and theme came from a misunderstanding. Helen Patterson came to San Miguel in late October 1992 for a facelist or "mascaracuero" which means mask to hide an old lady in spanish

November 2 was the first day she felt well enough to venture forth from the Spa after her surgery. As she walked the streets she began to cry when she saw all the Day of the Dead pictures, carvings and objet d'arte. Self centered, speaking not a word of Spanish and knowing nothing about Mexican customs she thought that the town had put on this festival to cheer her up and to celebrate her new look. Immediately she bought a house in Centro and remodelled it with some of the proceeds of her divorce. As more and more facelifts were done in San Miguel Helen, still speaking no Spanish nor knowing anything about where she lived, recruited fellow macaracueras into her Gang. Each November 2 they parade in the streets of San Miguel showing all women they can look like the Day of the Dead if they want.

This is a picture Helen has had commissioned of herself for her house.

Wanna Be's

2008-02-18T17:46:00.004-07:00

As the article below indicates, wanna be gang members try to get acceptance into gangs by committing small crimes. This is a wanna be. She is wearing no distinguishing gang regalia. She is thinking about stealing this car and turning it into a gang car (below) to get they approval and entrance into one of the Gangs of San Miguel.

Doing Good Works Gang

2008-02-17T16:57:00.013-07:00

DOING GOOD WORKS GANG

The underlying theme to San Miguel is ART. When you come to San Miguel you either make or buy ART. But not everyone has the talent, eye or wallet to make or buy ART. These poor souls were lost in San Miguel until the Doing Good Works Gang was formed. It took a long time to get this gang off the ground. The first step was finding a CAUSE. It had to be FUN, not involve a lot of time, leave members free for bridge games, not involve getting dirty, not cost a lot of money and provide a place to meet other ex pats. That is why the SPA was such an early hit for a CAUSE. But first they had to get rid of the all the ugly dogs with a city cull. Another easy one was the Library. The worst downside was dust on the books.

The next step is RECRUITMENT. They call gang members VOLUNTEERS and set up fairs to recruit them. They even put out lists showing Gang Members how they can help. The easier the CAUSE the more volunteers.

The next Step is RAISING MONEY. Early in the morning they invade the Jardin and set up tables staffed by VOLUNTEERS who coerce other gangs and TOURISTS to support their CAUSE. Here are some VOLUNTEERS

VOLUNTEERS use guilt to extract money from tourists. If you are a tourist reading this, then remember to always say you are going home tomorrow so you will never be there for any of their events.

On this day of this photo, three VOLUNTEERS had set up tables to help the Disabled (Cause #13), the Environment (Cause #23) and the politically unaware Mexicans (Cause #56). It got interesting when the local chanter in the Jardin tried to drive them from the Jardin by attacking their large sign and poster on one of his rounds of the Jardin. It ruffled them but had no effect as they all knew they were doing such good work.

The last step is PUBLICITY. What is the point of doing good works if no one know about it. Never give anyone your email address as it will be flooded with stories of their good works. Whenever anyone tells you about their GOOD WORKS be impressed.

The Classic Gang

2008-02-17T07:37:00.005-07:00

THE CLASSIC GANG

The first gangs in San Miguel developed this early, always classic look. It is a variation on pearls and the little black cocktail dress. The only colors are black and white and/or beige. You will see no household items on their back, front, hips or shoulders because they have never taken an art courses. They have no need to be CREATIVE because they are the Patrons of the Arts. They define what is ART in San Miguel. They never carry bags as they buy their ART at the openings and have it delivered to their CENTRO houses or HOUSE WITH VIEWS. Key words they use are Fabulous, Smart, Darling, Let's do ......, New.

TRAINING TO BE IN THE CLASSIC GANG

Novice Gang members need lots of help before they can be admitted to the Gang.

This Novice has been able to pass through the Eye of the Needle Test and this is her first day in the Jardin under the watchful eye of a Senior Gang Member. It is obvious from the picture what she needs to learn. It is almost a before and after picture.

RULES OF THE CLASSIC GANG

The Classic Gang is the meanest gang in the Jardin and has the most rules. Here is the detailed dress code for this gang.

Smart beige, black or white hat with only a white or black band.
Black sandals
Striped top, or solid white and/or black top
Peddle pusher pants never touching the sandals.
Smart jewelry
Simple bag

Break the rules and expect retribution. The woman below came to the Jardin in Bicycling Pants, in a blouse that was too big. She had on runners and no band on her hat. She was sent out of the Jardin tout de suite. She knows now that she will only be welcomed in the Campo.

CLASSIC GANG OR NOT

This person is not in the Classic Gang. She has broken three rules of the Classic Gang can you spot them?

Here is another mistake? Can you spot it?

Pop quiz - is this a Classic Gang member? Yes or no and defend your answer?

This is a bit harder. Is she or isn't she part of the Classic Gang?

Another tough test?

Gang Control of the Police

2008-02-16T17:05:00.002-07:00

A simple wave of her hand and the help of an accomplice brought the Jardine Police Officer under the control of the gang.

Single Women - How to Identify a Gay Gang

2008-02-16T16:59:00.003-07:00

It's all in the hats. One gang is gay one is straight. If you can't tell then don't ask Liza Minelli or her mother.

Men Gangs

2008-02-15T07:52:00.008-07:00

MALE GANGS

There are few men in San Miguel. Most men have been captured and are Love Slaves for female gangs or are gay and beyond control by women.

Free men in San Miguel have formed Four Gang groups based on

1. What you carry – the Briefcase and Backpack Gangs
2. What you wear on your head – the Panana Hat and Baseball Cap Gangs
3. What kind of jacket you wear – the Jean Jacket Gang
4. What you do with your hair or facial hair – the Pony Tail Gang, The Beard Gang, the Moustache Gang, the Goatee Gang

They travel in packs inside the Jardin to protect each other

Some men are members of several gangs at once

There is a surprising trend in Male gangs. The Mini Male Gangs or Psuedo Female Gang.

Chameleon Gang

2008-02-15T07:51:00.003-07:00

Chameleon Gang

The Colors of San Miguel are the inspiration for this group. With all the competition between gang members to catch a man, they have taken the competition one step further. They choose garb in the colors of the buildings in San Miguel and blend into the building. If you very look closely at this picture you can see a gang member in a burnt umber/orange color lying in wait for a man. If you can’t see her look for the newspaper she is reading. The man in the picture has no idea of what is about to befall him and the woman walking by will offer no assistance.

To further demonstrate the point see what happens when someone Chameleon Concept. This picture was taken from the Chameleon Gang Manual about What Not To Do. The purple member doesn't understand color blending and will come home to her pied a terre without a Love Slave.

Gang Activities

2008-02-15T07:49:00.008-07:00

WHAT DO GANGS DO IN SAN MIGUEL

Here is a list of some of the gang activities in San Miguel

Own Dogs

Shop

Steal

Raise MONEY for GOOD WORKS

Help people form Groups

Dress to match their Cars

Capture Love Slaves

Control the Police

Have their portrait done by an ARTIST

The Bags of San Miguel

2008-02-15T07:45:00.002-07:00

Everyone in San Miguel carries a bag – gang member and nogangos. Nogangos is the name gang members have given to anyone not in a gang. If you aren’t wearing a household item or aren’t in a man gang you are a nogangos. Bags are the one thing that bring people together in San Miguel. They are not signs of gangs but signs that we have lots of art and Mexican stuff to buy in San Miguel. If you are sitting in the Jardin ask people if you can look through their bag. In fact most people will let your rummage without even having to ask. When you find art or Mexican stuff, hold it up and say
”Tell me where you got this?” Everyone who has been in San Miguel for more than one day will have a recommendation of where to find something “Fabulous”. But when you hear people’s voices drop and say the words “Fabrica Aurora” then you have found someone who is a “True Patron of the Arts”. These are the holy people of San Miguel

The Where’s Waldo Gang

2008-02-15T07:43:00.002-07:00

This gang is beloved by children. It is based on the popular children’s book Where’s Waldo. Each member tries to put on as many different household items as they can find in the house before coming to the Jardin. When parents see them arrive they say to the children “Where’s the dishcloth”. Children will run up to the gang member who will pirouette as many times as the child asks while the child searches for the dishcloth. If they find the dishcloth the gang member will give them a Chiclet.

What's under the Tablecloth

2008-02-14T07:58:00.002-07:00

After a nasty rumble in the Jardin, a gang member was derugged and left to howl in the Jardin.

Comment from a Visitor who never joined a gang

2008-02-13T18:13:00.001-07:00

I had barely passed 24 hours in San Miguel before I began to feel a sort of discomfort. A sense of being 'ill at ease'........'out of place'. It was certainly not because I am unused to travel, lord knows I've spent many years responding to my wanderlust. What was it about this place that was different (and not in a good way)and that made me wrinkle up my nose and scratch my head every time I approached the Jardin? Unable to get comfortable, I took to wandering in any direction that would lead me away from this dreaded locale. Eventually, after several weeks, I realized what was happening. I was tired of all the expats staring at me! Probably wondering what I was doing in their shangri-la. When my anticipated volunteer project did not pan out, I was truly out of sorts. Granted, I did meet a few folks with whom I enjoyed spending time. Thank god! I left SM loving the town and still puzzled as to why the expat gangs have so taken hold in this town. Is is just because it's cheap and the weather is good? OKAY. I guess I can accept that. But in much the same way that I do not understand 'joiners' in general, I do not get the need for the gangs. Then again, I don't get the whole expat thing anyway, or at least not on any level that makes sense to me. This lovely town is great to visit, at least once. Maybe even more often if one finds ways to connect to the indigenous population and is able to escape 'gang' membership.

Laura Nurse

The False Boy Scout and Other Pseudo Men Gangs

2008-02-12T15:29:00.002-07:00

After being denied entry into one male organization after another from early childhood this San Miguel gang has reinvented itself as a False Boy Club. They deliberately dress like men. Other gangs adapt certain items of male attire.

The Gypsy Gang

2008-02-12T15:24:00.002-07:00

The Gypsy Gang is clever and every bit as dangerous as real gypsies. Often they hide begin larger members of various gangs and steal your english newspaper. A twirl of their diaphanous skirts and a small dog can disappear. Be aware at all times of this gang.

Black Bottom Gang

2008-02-12T15:18:00.001-07:00

What can you say about this gang that the picture doesn't tell you? They might be a Mexican gang and not American as they were speaking Spanish but don't be fooled if the gang speaks Spanish. Many gang members take Spanish lessons so they can order pastels and tapetes.

The Flower Hat Gang

2008-02-10T15:28:00.002-07:00

Hats are the easiest way to identify a gang. The first gang in San Miguel was the Classic Gang. They pure would never adorn their hats with anything but a simple black or white band. But it was hard to join this gang. You had to be rich, thin, have taste and own art. The later poorer and fatter arrivals with bad taste and a penchant for taking art classes couldn't get in so they formed their own Hat Gangs.

The Flower Hat gang is mostly British and take their themes from past remembered wallpaper and bedspreads.

The Tablecloth Gang

2008-02-10T15:23:00.002-07:00

Taking art courses at the Instituto Allende has encouraged many gang members to individuate. Noviates in the Tablecloth gang start with the single tablecloth worn over the shoulders. They are only allowed into the Jardin in the very early morning. As they meet their tasks set by the High Priestess of Damask and her Napkins as they are called, they can move to higher orders and more wear more tablecloths. This is a picture of a single colour, double tablecloth member.

To see that is under that tablecloth, go here

Captured in the Jardin by the Mixed Hat Gang

2008-02-10T15:16:00.000-07:00

This is the Mixed Hat Gang who have captured a widower.

The Picnic Tablecloth Gang

2008-02-10T15:12:00.001-07:00

This was a happy day in the Jardin when the leader of the Picnic Tablecloth Gang was expelled by Police Officer from the Jardin. But with so many ways to enter the Jardin we know she will be back. The Picnic Tablecloth gang broke away from the Tablecloth Gang because they only like to eat out door. Ten Ten Pie is a favorite hangout for them and there was quite a disturbance last month when a French family tried to eat lunch on a seated gang member.

The Red Hat Gang

2008-02-10T15:07:00.001-07:00

This gang originated in the United States. That gang colors can also be purple. They are not dangerous and mostly walk in the Jardin or sit quietly reading palms. They are not part of the Classic Gang. They drive Red VWs

There are lots of variations on dress style. The only unifying theme is the RED HAT

This Red Hatter has taken a cowboy Theme.

The Never Too Many Colors Gang

2008-02-10T07:56:00.002-07:00

This gang believes you can never wear enough colors at the same time. They are one of the most competitive gangs in San Miguel trying to out do each other in clashing colors. But be very careful if you like to wear only white and/or black or the dreaded beige. They will surround you and yell very nasty things at you. Be prepared to be called a 'onecolored' tourist and be splashed with phosphorescent colors.

The Parasol Gang

2008-02-10T07:43:00.001-07:00

This is one of the sadder gangs in San Miguel. She is the only member. She walks the Jardin every day enticing people with little turns of the parasol but can't get anyone else to join. So this is a safe gang and not to be feared.

The Rug Gang

2008-02-10T07:37:00.001-07:00

This gang broke off from the larger floor and wall covering gang. They only wear small brightly coloured area rugs. They carry small portable vacuums to keep clean and scoop lose change out of tourist purses.

The Multi Skirt Gang

2008-02-10T07:15:00.002-07:00

This gang is recognized by the fact they wear more than three skirts of different lengths at the same time. Be careful as they are known to whip long skirts off tourists and wrap them around themselves and taunt the deskirted tourist. They usually travel in packs and note the ballet slippers for fast get aways

My mother needed a round table but wouldn't spend the money to buy a proper wooden table so she bought a cardboard table and covered it with a lovely round tablecloth. Several years ago during a move the tablecloth disappeared. You can imagine my shock when I saw it in the Jardin as part of the attire of the Multi Skirt Gang